"Sex Drive"

New teen sex romps aren’t regularly churned out like they once were, and when they’re good, they’re lowbrow delights, so I say kudos whenever a new one heads our way, especially when one attempts an old-school sensibility and goes balls-out with its debauchery. However, while “Sex Drive” may earn its R-rating, it’s also dispiritingly dumb and flavorless, sharing with the pathetic “College” the attribute of trying desperately to appeal to an audience too young to see the movie. Based upon the premise that conventionally good-looking, toned (if quite Jewy) Ian, played by Josh Zuckerman, is unable to get laid and only can find a girl who’ll fuck him via the internet, the flick finds him stealing his brother’s (James Marsden) hot car and driving cross-country to aforementioned fuckhole with his fat Casanova buddy (Clark Duke) and girl-friend-who-obviously-likes-him-as-more-than-a-friend (Amanda Crew). Along the way, they have wacky adventures, natch. There’s nothing hilarious here, but the closest thing to funny is Seth Green in his 10 minutes as a sarcasm-prone, passive aggressive Amish gentleman. Duke’s character verges on annoying, but that’s due more to how he’s written – you can tell the actor has comedic skill (also shown in the web series “Clark & Michael”), and he’s likely be an asset in a funnier part/film. Marsden is similarly hampered by his gay-bashing character, whose sentiments/actions the movie doesn’t seem to look down upon. These are the sort of gay jokes that are placed most emphatically in the “homophobic” classification, and a late-in-the-game “twist” doesn’t serve to undo them, though that’s clearly the intent (see: “Chuck & Larry’s” having-its-mocking-fags-cake-and-eating-it-too). But surrounding the homophobia is a brand of comedy reliant on people getting hit in the balls, people getting hit in the face, characters being walked in on while masturbating, characters getting erections in unfortunate circumstances, and similarly familiar, low-brow stuff (I didn’t even mention the scat jokes). While it’s refreshing to see a non Apatow-related R-rated comedy, this lame crap serves as a reminder why his domination of the genre over the last few years has been so welcome.